Wednesday, August 14, 2019

Macbeth’s diary

On the day that the battle had ended, I galloped through the misted heath on my valiant steed. Along side my trust worthy, noble partner Banpuo. The battle had been against the traitors of the king's victorious country. As I galloped I looked apon the heath as if it was my own. Our clothes dripped with the blood or the rebels. One clear image remains, an image of McDonald, and I, Macbeth, unseaming him from the nave to the chop. In the distance were three figures. As they became clearer I sensed that Banpuo became unsteady on his horse. As we continued the figures also continued to become clearer. The figures were not man or women. Not black or white. An expeditious decision led me to believe that the figures were witches. At that point I became uneasy on my steed as my fear grew. I stepped down from my horse closely followed by the brother I never had. Banquo gasped I breathed in deeply and stepped forward. He then asked how far isn't called to Forrest. He rapidly stepped back, I followed his eye movement and it was at that moment I realised that they were not to be taken lightly. Then as I stared in horror and a slight fear, Banquo began to speak. I then stood straight demanded for them to speak unless it was beyond their ability. They stepped forward and then they began to reveal themselves to us. They called upon me as my thane name. I lowered my head a little so that they would know that this was I. I looked at Banquo, he seemed to be as confused as I was. Then a second stepped forward. It also called out but this time of a different name. ‘Thane of Cawdor' is how they addressed me. So many questions went through my head. How Thane of Cawdor – he still lived. Then before I could ask myself any more questions, a third stepped forward to join the other two. Only this time it said, â€Å"All hail Macbeth! That shall be king hereafter!† Those words where the so exhilarating but at the same time I had so many questions. How? The king had two sons. I was no relation. But what if it was true how would it happen I could only think of one thing. No it will not happen. The only reason I met the witches was because I was on my back form a battle in which I had fought for king and country. Then I looked at Banquo; he then asked me why I seemed to fear. After he spoke this he stepped forward and wanted to know his destiny (if that was what they spoke of or maybe it is truth.) Then all three witches hailed Banquo but I was put to rest when they said â€Å"Hail Banquo lesser than Macbeth† I let out a sigh, â€Å"But then greater†. How greater than king. If I was to become king I knew that he couldn't be better than be as I had been greater than he had all of my life. Then the witch's started to drift away but they would not. I demanded for them to stop but no such reply did I get from the imperfect speakers. I was shocked yet all I could think about was why would Banquo's sons be king and not my own. I looked back at were my horse stood. I climbed upon my trustful steed and galloped deep into the heath with Banquo aside me. I recall the sound of footsteps. In front of us were Ross and Angus bringing news of the king's greatest gratitude. I was showered with praise then I heard what would be some of the most memorable words in my intire life. † And, for n earnest of a greater honour. He blade me from him call thee thane of Cawdor† Banquo yelled out in my presence â€Å"What can the devil speak true?† A thousand questions trust trough my mind. How, Why. The thane of Cawdor still lived. Was it a joke? No truth was spoken. I asked them why they dressed me in borrowed robes. They told me how he was under heavy judgement. I remember asking Banquo if he hoped that his children would be kings. As the first part of the devils words came true for me. I thought about the two truths that they spoke off. I was rapt. I felt as if I cleaved not to their mould. I wondered whether the message was good or bad. I had a very sudden thought. A horrid image or death and murder, evil. I was given the titles Glamis and Cawdor with out killing but then again king is a much greater title. I wanted to see the king maybe to remind myself of the good man that he was. I stirred, I was horrid, Banquo seemed to want to go but I was still very weary of what Banquo was feeling. I felt anxious to be king for it was always my dream it brought back memories and dreams that I once had to be king. Would they finally come true? Before I left I sent a letter to my dear wife telling her of my encounter with the witches and my thoughts about Banquo's supposed future. As Banquo and I fled into the castle accompanied by Ross and Angus, King Duncun labelled me worthy cousin. At this point in time I was overwhelmed with emotions. I was proud because the king of Scotland said that I as his worthy cousin. But also that it was another reason for me not to kill him after all being labelled a worthy cousin of the king is reward in its self. I was smiling but I couldn't help but wonder to myself if I was just pretending to like when I knew that it would only fill me with more contrition than I already had. I told Duncun of how I owed him everything and that doing it was a reward in itself. How could I lie to my king? I told him â€Å"Is to receive our duties; and our duties are to your throne and state, children and servants.† Then to my complete amazement he announced that he would be coming to my house for a feast. I was over come with astonishment. The king at my house it was such an honour but then after thinking that It was an honour I thought of how uncomfortable I would be knowing that I was thinking about, about murdering the king. Then with out anyone knowing he announced that his son was the new prince of Cumberland. This meant that he was inline to be the next king. So any hopes that I had of me getting the title without doing anything had disappeared. It was at this moment I felt more strongly but also scared about killing the king after all he was my king. The man who gave me such titles as, Thane of Glamis and Thane of Cawdor. As I left the room I tried to find something to hide my anger. So I looked to the stars and asked the solemnly, † Stars hide your fires! Let not light see my black and deep desires.† I wanted to be hidden so that all of my raging anger was concealed. Then I solidly remember what was going through my mind I was thinking and looking at my hand, the hand that might possibly kill the king of Scotland. I wrote a second letter to my wife telling her that the king was coming to our house but also some of my thoughts I didn't want to trouble her with all of them. As I set off the king told everyone to follow me and that I would bid them all welcome to my home. As we all arrived at my castle my wife greeted me not by darling or husband but as great Glamis and worthy Cawdor. This one a exceedingly special occasion for me because my meant so much to me that I felt so proud and just happy. Then I told her when Duncun was coming and when he would hence. As we began to talk about the letters, the witches and all of the happenings she began to seem determined and different in someway I can't explain how. The banquet was set for the king but I could not stay in the Kings Company. The guilt of my thoughts was too much. I was struggling with my conscience. I remember thinking that is I was to it, it would have to be done quickly with no hesitation. But he was a fair king how could I do it, he was such a gentlemen. I was his host I was surpposed to close the door on the murderers not bare the knife myself. If I were to do it there would be tears all over the kingdom and everyone would mourn his death. How could I do it to such a dear and well thought of man? My wife came to speak to me and asked why I left the banquet, I didn't answer, I just wanted to know if he had asked for me. She said no but she also started to insult me because I told her that we would not proceed any further in the business. She was using language that she of all people knew would agitate me no end. I told her to stop but she wouldn't if I was to do. This then I would a monster. I tried to be the best that I could be but for some reason it was only now I felt as if it was insufficient. Then I began to wonder what had changed as she said, â€Å"Be so much the man†¦. I have given suck, and know how tender't is to love the babe that milks me.† Had she really changed or was she just trying to shock me into the action. Either way I felt as if it was working. But what if we should fail? My doubts grew yet as she answer they all began to dissolved like a drug in water. I began to feel as if my wife was stronger than I was. I was just filled with a feeling of confusion. Then out of nowhere she suggested to blame the guards that would lay outside the king's chamber. Then I told her that she should only give birth to males. I couldn't kill him; she must have seen my doubts in my expressions because once again she began to attack my manhood. Then putting my entire disbelief aside I settled on the decision that I would do it I would kill the king of Scotland. I would kill him but until then I would be like a flower hiding the great serpent. As I walked through the long corridors that seemed never ending, I recall seeing Banquo and his son Fleance. I felt so much guilt for the intense concoctions that brewed in my mind. When Banquo informed me of his dream about the witch's I was overwhelmed with guilt for lying to such a pure man. As I left Banquo I proceeded along the long and winding corridors, a fatal vision appeared before my eyes. Could the mind create such a false vision? I said to myself. As I looked closer it seemed to resemble a dagger of my own. I reached for my dagger grasping it but never taking my eyes of the dagger. Then I tried to grasp it but to my own amassment my hand went straight through it. It began to move, so I followed it my heart pounding like the drums at a beheading. I was short of breath and my mouth was completely dry. Whilst I was following the knife I realised that it was leading me to the king's chamber. I felt as if the witches were there, that they were influencing me but I still decided to follow the dagger. I felt that on a night such as the one that night there was evil in the air. Then out of nowhere gouts of blood appeared on the dagger dripping from the tip. This disturbed me because even though I have seen lots of blood before never the kings. I felt like a ghost, almost invisible as I walked through the passages getting closer to the King's room. All of a sudden the bell that invited me to Duncun's murder chimed. The bell of Duncun's death called me. I looked out of the and then for the first time taking my eyes of the bloody dagger. I peered out of the window and found myself lost in thought. I was sweating and was very hot I went into the room were the king lay asleep and the deed was done†¦ Then suddenly I heard footsteps I felt uneasy and quit scared. My mouth became dry once again and my palms became very sweaty. Then my wife appeared I was breathing heavily. With two bloodstained daggers in my hands. I told her that the deed was done. I began to hear things. I was extremely effected by the murder that I had committed that I had forgotten the instructions that my wife had given me. As I had still had the bloodstained daggers in my hand which dripped the blood of Duncun. I told her that I was never going in there again. I just couldn't go back in the room were the king had died, were he was murdered, by me. Her anger was immense she quickly took them from me and followed her own instructions. I remember feeling and knowing that I would be dammed for this dishonourable crime that committed. I was looking at my hands so red so wet†¦ so bloody. Such a sight will remain in my mind forever! I heard one of the guards screaming murder! He was saying prayers. I was so frightened. I was sweating; I could feel the river flowing down my back and trickling down my forehead down to my nose then into my mouth the salty sensation almost took my mind of the murder. Only to be interrupted by my oh so changed attitude from my wife. It was remarkable; I didn't know that someone so close to me, someone who I had known for so long could change so quickly and considerably. I would sleep no more. I felt so scared that I would never sleep or even be able to rest again. I could never of thought that this murder would effect me this much but it did and that in itself confused me. I was indescribable fear. No words can say what I was going through. It was the worst moment of my life. Suddenly there was knocking at the door, which gave me a fright, I yelled with no hesitance, â€Å"Wake Duncun with thy knocking! I would thou coulst!† I regret saying this, and then my wife dragged out me away. As I walked down stairs in a fresh set of cloths Macduff and Lennox were there. Macduff asked me if Duncun was awake, so I took them to Duncun as we walked Lennox and Macduff kept on asking me questions. Each time I was filled with dread and deep remorse. Almost every sentence from my mouth was a lie. Then we arrived at the door; I was the only one there who really knew what was inside. Macduff went inside the room, whilst Lennox and I stood outside. He was telling me about the weather last night, he was taking about hearing screaming and strange things happened. I was being eaten from the inside. Macduff ran out of the chamber and screamed â€Å"O horror! †¦ Horror! †¦ Horror!† We both asked what he was talking about, I felt expectant, and I was just waiting for him to say it was Macbeth who killed him but he didn't. Lennox was confused but I knew what he meant. We went into the room and we looked around. Outside I could hear Macduff shouting things like, † Ring the alarm bell!†¦ Murder and treason!† Everyone was outside so I killed the guards and made it look like an act of anger when I did this I thought that it would take the focus from me but to Macduff it just made it worse. He asked my why I did it, I thought that he was suspicious, I told him that I couldn't help it and that I was so angry that I saw the blood on them and their daggers that I just lashed out. My dear wife then fainted, I think she did this because she knew that I was not up to talking to anyone at the moment and I might have broken down. Then Banquo said something unforgettable to me, â€Å"And question this most bloody piece of work to know it further.† I knew that he would be suspicious. He thought that there was more to his death. This made me very worried I thought that I had very good reason. I thought that I was finished. I mean he was there when I met the witch's. Then with good reason the two sons of the king Donalbain and Malcolm fled the country afraid of their own lives. So I, Macbeth, was crowned the new king of Scotland my coronation was brief but for filling I was proud of myself even though I was not proud of what I did to do it. Then came the day after my egotistical coronation. I felt so much better because I was organising a banquet to celebrate my coronation. I saw Banquo in the morning and questioned what he was doing for the day. I told him that I wanted him to come to the banquet. Banquo and Fleance left for a day of hunting. I spoke to the rest of my men and told them that they could have the rest of the day of until seven o'clock when they would all attend the banquet. As everyone but one of my many servants left the room, I told my servant to fetch me those men. As I was left alone I began to speak to myself and re assure myself that I had to do this to keep my crown safe and that I needed to be done if I wanted to keep my crown. He was the competition he would produce a long line of kings, inless I stopped him and to do that I would have to kill him and his son. For the first time I felt determined but I also felt something's that had been frequent in my feelings like fear and anger. If I wouldn't keep the crown then it was fruitless. I was not willing to let that happen so I decided that when the murderers got back I was to give them the go ahead, to kill Banquo and Fleance. My servant and two murderers came through the door. I didn't want to speak with them for long so I just told him that Fleance's death was just as important as Banquo's and that it must be done far away from the palace also that it was to be done that very same night. Even th ough I was swamped with guilt and anger I also knew that it had to be done. I didn't tell my wife, I locked her out because I had a feeling that she wouldn't be able to deal another murder. I went to see her; she was my clueless wife. I was trying to protect her, I told her, â€Å"Thou know'st that Banquo and his Fleance lives.† Something would be done when the darkness came then I would be jocund. Then I left her to get ready for my Banquet to celebrate that I became king. The Banquet was ready everyone had arrived accept for Banquo, I walked swiftly into the room and the atmosphere was like no other. Everyone stood up and applauded me. This was the proudest moment of my intire life†¦ king such an achievement, I thought it could only be dreamed about until that moment in time. As my lords who were once my fellow fighters stood up I looked around but did not see Macduff. But at that moment in time I want bothered. I could feel my jaw aching from the full smile on my face. I looked around and saw a spare seat upon my men and lords so I walked over and sat with them. I did this so that they would think of me as a peoples king, a good king. As I began to sit down. Lurking in the doorway was one of the murderers walked over to him and said, † There's blood upon thy face!† To my greatest satisfaction he told me that it was Banquo's blood. I told him that it is better on him than inside Banquo. He told me of how he slit his throat. Relief ran through my veins. But before I got to excited I asked about his, but there was no such luck to be had there. He notified me that he had run away. I was filled with dread something had to be done but what I didn't know what. I was filled with complete horror I was shocked, mortified and extremely troubled. I melted into as much fear that was in my bones when I committed the murder of Duncun. As I turned round I tried my best to be strong; I fled back to the spare seat only to be greeted by the cold corps of Banquo. All I could do was shout which one of you has done this? â€Å"What my lord?† They were totally clueless; I reacted to the goast almost screaming at it, Thou canst not say I did it! . . . Never shake thy gory locks at me! My wife then whispered to me, â€Å"Are you a man?† I told her that I was but a bold one, she kept answering back so I told her to look and behold. Then the ghost disappeared, I told her victim's appered with twenty mortal murders on their crowns, and push us from our stools. This was stranger than such a murder was. Then I spoke to my company and told them not to look mutely at me. Then the ghost reappeared at first I didn't see it but when I did I quickly reacted by yelling avaunt and quit my sight! Let the earth hide me. The reason that I remember so much about it is because it was such an ugly sight that I will never forget what I had to say to him or it. My wife lied to my guests telling them that I was ill. Then I carried on shouting, screaming trying to scramble to safety in my mind. It disappeared so I said †¦why so †¦ being gone. I was still unaware that only I could see the ghost, I was speaking to my guests but I don't remember what I was saying. Ross then said, â€Å"What sights, my lord?† It was only now that I finally realised that only I could see the ghost, my wife told everyone to leave us and Lennox told me to have better health. After everyone had left I told my wife that there was no going back and that I would be punished for this. I decided to go back the witch's, I am determined to know what's going to happen to me next. I knew that I had to find out what was to come and if it was worse than had already come. Before I left I asked if she had noticed if Macduff was at the banquet that started of to be a celebration. She said no, so I began to worry about his suspicions and why he wasn't there. Having found no conciliation or help I decided to go to bed and then in the morning return to the heath where it had all started. After a restless night, I had decided to go to the heath to find the witch's. As I arrived at the heath upon where we had first met I saw the hags and addressed them for what they were. When I called them old hags it was to try and show them that I had more power than they did. I soon realised that they were not afraid when then replied, † A deed without a name.† This worried me slightly, I remember thinking what I was thinking trying to overpower such evil. I demanded to know what was coming I educated them with what I had to say. Then I told them that I demanded them to see their masters and not hear from them. As I was waiting the flashes of lightning and the lions roaring from above shocked me. Then all of the witches chanted, † Come high or low, thyself and office deftly show.† It was at this moment that I knew that I was going to find out what my future was. Then suddenly, out of the cauldron arose an armed head and spoke, † Macbeth! Macbeth! Macbeth! Beware Macduff!† I had come to the heath looking for good news, some informative information but so far all I had got was confirmed suspicions. I said a quick thank you and asked them to know more and to tell me of it. â€Å"He will not be commanded. Here's another more potent that the first.† One of the witches's quickly announced. Then another image appeared from the cauldron called on me just as the first but then said, † Be bloody, bold and resolute. Laugh to scorn the power of man; for none of women born shall harm Macbeth.† Why should I fear, all men are born of a woman then why should I fear? It was at this point I began to wonder if I was immortal, if I was blessed with the gift of ever lasting life. I will remember those words for as long as I shall live. Then I had an outburst and shouted and then live Macduff. What need I fear? But just in case I was to have him killed I remember feeling such relief, joy, delight, I had renewed bravery and a new spirit. Then another apparition arose from the cauldron and it was a child, crowned, with a tree in his hand. At first I remember not knowing what it meant so I asked the witch's what it was, they told me to listen but not to speak do I did and only to find out the best news so far. It said that I would not vanquish until the great Birnam wood moves. This only confirmed my suspicions about being immortal. Then the cauldron began to disappear and the next eight kings of Scotland appeared all resembling and carrying Banquo's spirit. I screamed out to the witch's and interrogated them on why they showed me this. Before I could ask them anything else they danced and vanished. All of a sudden Lennox appeared startling me, I asked if he had seen the hags, he replied with a simple no. Looking back I don't remember all that he said but I did hear the sound that triggered my anger and my fear, which was that Macduff had fled to England. This meant that I couldn't kill him. So instead I went to his ca stle were I was to kill his wife and babes. So of we went to the castle. I told all of my attendants not to bring me anymore reports that I didn't care, until the wood moves I shall not fear. I remember that no matter how many times I said it I didn't fear, if anything it made me stronger. I felt so succour, so safe and strong. Not just my heart but my mind, for the first time in a long time. I was interrupted by one of my servants, he informed me that there were English soldiers in their thousands. I began to realise the depth in which I had sunk. I called in my chief officer, Seyton, and I told him to tell me what was happening with the English. He said â€Å"All is confirmed, my lord, which was reported.† At this I recall asked him to bring me my armour, but he then went on to saying that it was not needed yet. I turned to my doctor and asked him how the patient was referring to my wife. He then said that she wasn't so sick but she did see fancies that stooped her from sleeping. I wanted it all to just go away, my wife did not deserve to not sleep. I did the deed so I should be punished. She did nothing so why was she suffering so much? Then I shouted out that I would no fear till the wood of Birnam wood come to Dunsinane. I met with my soldiers to tell them that I did not fear that they would not starve me out. I could feel my strength and my security. Then I heard an ear piecing scream from above, I had almost forgotten the taste and smell of fear itself. I was told that it was my wife's cry. This made me feel like falling to my knees. But I couldn't deal with it; the English soldiers were coming. After doing everything I now have no one to share it with no one. Then one of my servants rushed in and I told him that I didn't want to hear it. But still he told me, â€Å"I looked towards Birnam and anon the wood began to move. I screamed liar slave! I remember being in extreme anger and disbelief. Then I went with the messenger to see for myself and when I did I felt a shiver down my spine I began to doubt the witch's. Still with some respect left I took all my strength and went to the gate with my amour on to face the fiends. The alarms where sounded and I appeared to show my face to Macduff. I wasn't afraid of him because no man could kill me so I told him and the answer was not so nice as the question he told me that he was ripped from his mothers whom. This made me scared, the witch's had tricked me into thinking that I was immortal and that no man could kill me. But I was not a coward I told Macduff that I would fight only to lose. We fought our heavy swords dragging us down. I felt as if every muscle was being dragged out of my body and then Macduff drew his sword at me for one last time and†¦

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